GREAT NEWS! The one and only Sarah "Barracuda" Palin will be coming to my neighborhood! That's right folks the infamous "Going Rogue" book tour is heading for Dallas! I will have the opportunity to get my very own copy of Going Rogue personally signed by Mizz Mavericky herself!
OR.....
I can go rogue and cause a HUGE distraction for what I'm sure will be a well recieved get together for the gun toting hockey moms of the north Dallas area...
Believe it or not, I'm opting for door number 2.
Now, what would be the best plan of attack? I've already ruled out bomb threat. Seeings how that's a federal offense and would cost me precious years of my life... I thought about taking a play from the angry GOP's playbook and show up armed... That could get me shot here in the Great State of Texas. No thanks.
The only real plausible idea I have is to use the Texan pride. It is quite impressive. It's an all go, no quit kind of attitude that has zero tolerance for likes of any weak hearted types. So my idea, in rough form will be to stand in front of Legacy Books and simply wear a sign that reads. "TEXANS HATE QUITTERS". As we all know Sarah Barracuda quit just over halfway through her first term as Governor of the shithole known as Alaska... The Texan populace would agree and be torn between their beloved maverick and the facts. Should get interesting.
I have til December 4th to come up with the master plan. Any and all advice on how to make this more awesome would be much appreciated. Wish me luck.
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Sounds like a good plan hombre. Don't forget to remind her that she sucks moose nuts too.
ReplyDeleteRoger that, on the other side of my sign it'll say Dear Sarah, you suck moose nuts. Love Gabe.
ReplyDeleteAsk her when she's going to pose in Playboy
ReplyDelete